Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
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Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
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Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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