apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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