I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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