its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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