You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
