Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
