living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
