Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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