Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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