You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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