then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
