I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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