Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
