i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Pants are for mortals
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
