At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize