no, he came in my armpit
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
