I think i sorta joined a cult last night
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
so let's talk penis.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
