i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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