i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
