Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
