I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize