I think i peed on brittanys purse
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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