if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
