never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
