I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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