I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
