Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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