we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
