Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
