....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
