dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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