That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
