So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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