i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
nutella sex= disaster
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
