It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
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