I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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