she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize