Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize