I have demons in me.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
