Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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