I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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