the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
