New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I am available for nakedness
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize