i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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