sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Shame is for Republicans.
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