She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
