You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize