new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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