i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
