Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
