I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I just googled if crying burns calories
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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